6 Steps to Surviving a Break-In

The truth is, nobody really knows how to respond to a break-in. Who burgles homes and why they do it remains a mystery. Nearly 98 out of 100 home intrusions cases go unsolved every year…

9 Fun and Flirty Concepts for Three-Piece Summer Swimwear

You’ve spent all of lockdown counting carbs and honing your beach body; you deserve a chic swimsuit that shows off all your COVID curves.

Lord Maroon Can Meow! Canst Thou?

O! The wonders of my lord Maroon do abound! He’s a walking menagerie of wondrous sounds.

5 Clues Pritchard Is Actually a Woman

Ferdinand L’Apogee’s latest novel, Night Spots, dropped this week, and readers have already developed a controversial theory about a fan-favorite character.

New Fiction in the Twisted Anatomy anthology

Have you read “A Rose for Emily”? Replace racism with circumcision, and you have some idea what to expect from my new short story, which appears in Twisted Anatomy, a charity anthology of body horror from the editors at Sci-Fi and Scary.

New Fiction in The Cafe Irreal

Doomed zeppelins floating aimlessly among a sea of a chemicals. A hansom-driver turned captain. A prohibition on coffee.

All I Want for Christmas is You

The man smiled, dimpled, ruddy cheeks like two sugar plums. “Little Ollie’s on the top of my list this year. I just can’t disappoint him. And his letter was very specific.”

Shedding

Dinah inspected the withered trunk, the dry, shriveled limbs. “Fucking shit, dude,” she said. “How long you had this thing, since the Dark Ages?”

I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus

A cluster of flies, like black grapes, swarmed over the sherry-stained carpet, seduced by its fermented sweetness, though any liquid had long since evaporated.

Silent Night

“Shhh-shh-shhhhh.” Warner held up a ruddy finger. “Hear that?”